more than words

BLOG! :D

Sometimes, it's so hard for me to express my feelings.
Sometimes, I just dont know how.

There are times where I want to just give my Mom a hug, telling her that I love her and I admire her so much for being so selfless.

There are times where I want to give my brother a hug, tell him I love him, and I'm so proud that he's doing well in his studies.

There are times where I'd like so much to talk to my Dad, give him a hug. Tell him how thankful I am of him, how proud i am of him, that he sacrifices being away from my Mom, just so that we can lead a good life.. Dad, I love you. And i really do hope you'll be able to read this blog post, somehow, someway. (:

There are times, like just now, where i want to leap up and down for joy for my beloved little sister when she was screaming and running around the whole house, telling everyone "THEY ASK ME TO COME DOWN FOR ANOTHER CHRISTMAS AUDITION! THEY ASK ME TO COME DOWN FOR ANOTHER CHRISTMAS AUDITION! I DONT CARE, EVERYONE HAVE TO GO WATCH THE DRAMA!" and.. i wished so much to jump up from my seat and give her a hug, tell her i'm so proud of her.. but i just couldn't.. My butt just stayed glued to the chair and refuse to jump up. Same goes for my mouth, didn't say anything.. I regret my actions now.. All i can hope for is that somehow, my sister will still read my blog and she'll know how proud i am of her. (: Love you, little sis. *hug.

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/20/2007 08:24:00 PM;

I'VE GOT BLACK HAIR.
I'M BACK TO BLACK.
I'M BACK TO 16 YEARS OLD.

:D

okay,
today was a bad, good, good, good day. (:

woke up at 7. went to company aunty to doctors after doctors and to the lawyers, till about 1130.

SO LONG KAY, I WAS ROTTING.

okay, than it was shopping, than LUNCH.

FRENCH TOAST WAS HEAVENLY. I CRAVE I CRAVE I CRAVE.
SHOPPING
SHOPPING
SHOPPING.

My aunt spent like $1000+ on two coach shoes and $3000 on CK tops. SIAO RIGHT.
FOOD
FOOD
FOOD.

SHOPPING
SHOPPING
SHOPPING.

CUT HAIR
DYE HAIR
TREATMENT HAIR.

HOME

FOOD

TEEVEE

BATHE

HERE.

(:

SLEEEEEEP.

i.. i can't wait for the future. (:

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/15/2007 11:42:00 PM;

I really wish you knew that i really meant to blog about how much fun I had in the past two days. I was honestly thinking about how to say it in the sweetest possible way. But i dont know if it matters as much now.

I don't care though,
No matter how much I've messed up,
No matter how much we've argued,
No matter how much rotten bananas we've gone through,
I'd still want you to know that i had buckets.. no, truckloads.. no, oceans of laughter and smiles these past two days.

xoxo

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/14/2007 12:01:00 AM;

School's been draggy and long today.
Dont have any frees today.
Didn't do math homew but it's okay. I really couldn't do it.
I have school till 6 today.
Singers are having intensive rehearsals in November.
Oh, i'm performing in a choir with my school on Nov 13th, anyone want to come?
it's at esplanade, 730PM.

(:

My eye bags are the now the size of Paris.

There are so many holiday homew assigned.
So far, there are two essays. 1000 words each.
Chinese test tomorrow.
English worksheets.
Art.
And the week isn't over yet.

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/10/2007 02:08:00 PM;

School has been wearing me out so much these few days.
I've decided to blog more. (: Bout my boring, boring life.

Saturday, i was in school from 4PM-9PM doing art and having choir prac.
Sunday, i was in school from 1.30PM-930PM having rehearsal and art.
Monday, i was in school from 8AM-930PM having school and did art for 7 and a half hours.

I'm really tired, really really worn out.

It's 6:11PM now and i'm still in school waiting for mom to come pick me and my sister up.

My stomac's screaming for food,
My body's crying out for sleep,
My heart's crying out for your love.

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/09/2007 06:03:00 PM;

Hahaha. I think this is quite hilarious. Almost everyone was drifting in and out of sleep in my psych class. Teacher's away. (:

Right, quite random.

We could leave this town and run forever;
10/02/2007 09:15:00 AM;

It feels quite weird in a good kind of way being back, here, on the balcony after so long.

Watched the sky go dark today..
and i wonder if you were looking up the sky too. (:

The serenity of this place never fails to calm me down and take my worries away. (:

zann baby, i miss you. (:

We could leave this town and run forever;
9/30/2007 07:18:00 PM;

I'm not proud of what's been going on in school.

Getting
3/10 for Chemistry,
33/55 for Math,
15/50 for Art,
4/7 for English..
is not one of the best news to tell everyone.

Jac, buck up.

We could leave this town and run forever;
9/26/2007 11:47:00 AM;

Go, she whispered to herself. Go find the darkest corner there is in your room, maybe, just maybe, you'll find some comfort there.

Curl up, hug your knees, maybe you'll feel better.

She wanted so much to throw her books, her pillow and everything in sight against the wall.. but she couldn't even find the strength to pick herself up.

She wanted time to stop, so she wouldn't have to face the things which will happen later on in the day. She felt like she didn't have the strength to carry on. She didn't want tomorrow to come, at least for now.

Pushing aside the million and one thoughts racing through her head, all she wanted was to feel numb. Numb
everything.. the words, the feelings, the hurt.

She felt like she wasn't good enough, ideal enough, wonderfuly perfect enough..

Oh. Don't worry, i'll live.

We could leave this town and run forever;
9/13/2007 12:23:00 AM;

blog blog blog..

what's there to blog?

that it's just the second week of school and it's already tiring?
that..

great, i just lost all inspiration to blog. (:

silly me.

We could leave this town and run forever;
8/29/2007 10:41:00 PM;